Arcas Gwynbach
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The image used for SCP-3603 in its original eBay listing.

Item #: SCP-3603

Object Class: Safe (SCP-3603), Euclid (SCP-3603-P)

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3603 is to be kept in a sealed concrete enclosure in the F Warehouse accessable only to those with Level 3 and above security clearance.

Examples of fully manifested SCP-3603-P are to be kept in a small onsite prison conversationally known as the “Phil Bloc”. SCP-3603-P specimens are to be the only individuals permitted in the block barring SCP Foundation personnel. The perimeter of the concrete complex is to be patrolled by rotating shifts of 5 guards armed with handguns and sniper rifles.

Due to the identical nature of specimens of SCP-3603-P, each resident is tattooed with a number on the back of its neck. If any resident is not accounted for in head count, the facility guards are to be ordered to enact SLP (Security Lockdown Procedure) Foxtrot, which consists of [DATA EXPUNGED – PROCEDURE UNDER REVIEW]. See relevant assignment briefing for more details.

Should specimens of SCP-3603-P become belligerent, physical, up to and including lethal, force is authorized but is recommended to be used with discretion. Specimens of SCP-3603-P caught engaging in violence or [REDACTED] among themselves are to be placed in solitary confinement for a minimum of five hours with more time to be added depending on the severity and specifics of the altercation. Any specimens attempting escape are to be shot on sight and their carcasses shipped back to headquarters for thorough examination.

Description: SCP-3603 is a vinyl LP of the 1985 Phil Collins album No Jacket Required. The album is physically unremarkable in every respect except for the serial number, which when cross-referenced corresponds to no serial number listed in the archive. The album is accompanied by its original dust jacket and interior photograph. When examined by a professional vinyl resale agent, SCP-3603 was declared to be in “near-mint or very good plus” condition. The vinyl disc itself is free from cracks, scratches and warps and the pattern of grooves on its surface correspond exactly to non-SCP examples of the release.

The only physical abnormality noted with SCP-3603 is that no dust has ever been observed to collect on its surface, regardless of the length of time it is kept in storage. Further tests are required to determine the specifics of this anomaly.

When a subject listens to the audio on the vinyl disc of SCP-3603, manifestation of a specimen of SCP-3603-P will begin to occur. The manifestation speed positively corresponds to the amount of time a subject spends listening to SCP-3603. If the album is listened to front to back or otherwise for the full equivalent of its runtime, uninterrupted manifestation will occur. Less time spent listening to the album has been tentatively shown to prolong the period over which manifestation occurs. No correlation between manifestation speed or particulars and the physical characteristics of human subjects has been observed. Proposals regarding experimentation on nonhuman subjects are currently under review. SCP-3603-P specimen collection dates back to 1989, 21 years prior to the containment of the object currently designated SCP-3603.

SCP-3603-P-1 through SCP-3603-P-15 are 15 physically identical middle-aged, Caucasian human males. Brain scans of SCP-3603-P specimens reveal identical patterns of brain activity among the population in response to the same stimuli. SCP-3603-P specimens are also, as much as has been determined through archival footage and photographs, physically identical to the 1985 appearance of English musician Phil Collins.

Each specimen claims its name is Phil Collins and that it is an English musician and former actor. When confronted with the truth about their existence and origins, specimens of SCP-3603-P are invariably disbelieving and belligerent. Extensive tests and interviews have determined that attempts to convince specimens of SCP-3603-P of the fallacy of their beliefs are unproductive and non-essential interactions with the specimens are discouraged as a whole.