Argenti Aertheri
rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-1500-J

Object Class: Thaumiel Adorable

Special Containment Procedures: Object is to be kept in a 50m x 50m x 50m room, lined with Telekill Alloy (SCP-148). If object enters a rage state, a priest of an Abrahamic religion is to perform [REDACTED] exactly 8 spoons, or any other prime number of spoons. When not in a rage state, object is allowed free reign of Site 19 due to the affect on employee morale.

Specimens are to be lavished with any and every cat toy ever created, and the best wet food available, as well as perpetual access to multiple waterfall ponds containing reverse osmosis water obtained from pure natural springs. Multiple cat trees, perches and clawing posts are to be located throughout the site, such that no subject is ever more than 3m from at least one such item. Litter boxes are the be changed immediately after each use and are to be contained within covered areas to allow the cats privacy on par with human facilities.

Under no circumstances is the object to be cross tested with SCP-914.

Description: SCP-1500-J is composed of approximately 63.007 cubical cats, which are adorable little kittens. D'AWWW LOOK AT THE WITTLE KITTY! Ahem, as I was saying…

When frustrated, annoyed, or [DATA EXPUNGED], they may enter a rage state, which causes hit points to double. This causes all 63.007 kitties to combine into one massive spherical cat, which [REDACTED] resulting in over ██,███,██7 deaths to date. Cause of death appears to have been a fatal overdose of cuteness. Or maybe claws, hard to tell given how cute the little kitties are when they're all combined into one massive ball of cute. Should anyone survive an attempt at cuddling them while in a rage state, they are to be demoted to keter duty immediately.

Being in close proximity to the object causes a psychic compulsion to talk about the kitties are though they are the CUTEST THING EVER! This effect lingers for some time after leaving the range of effect. The range of this effect is unknown at this time, but who cares, they're adorable!

What idiot entered this into the database? They're just darling little kittens! — Doctor Aertheri