Ihpkmn

CAN = Confirmed Abnormal Nexus
CART = Concrete Anomaly- Ready to Transport

SCPs

rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-3829

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-3829 are to be stored in an isolated low-concern item storage locker in Site-24. No images, written documents, or electronic devices capable of interacting with SCP-3829 are to be allowed within 2 meters of this locker. Testing is permitted only by permission of two members of Site administration.

No more than 10 instances of SCP-3829-A are to exist in Foundation custody at any given time. In the event that an uncontained instance of SCP-3829-A is located, it is to be intercepted, and the storage media it is present on be destroyed.

Testing with depictions of actual individuals is disallowed following Test 38. In the event that one or more lamps within Site-24 are observed to have bare bulbs, this is to be reported to Site-24 security, as it may indicate a containment breach.

Description: SCP-3829 is the unaired 24 minute pilot of a sitcom entitled "Crossing Over". Records regarding SCP-3829 indicate that it was intended to be aired on the Fox network during the fall 1997 season; however, due to legal issues apparently unrelated to SCP-3829's anomaly, it never aired. SCP-3829-A refers to all storage mediums which contain SCP-3829.

SCP-3829 is capable of integrating the characters, storylines, and continuity of media stored within 1.2m of it into its own plot. This has the side effect of rewriting the exposed media to be an instance of SCP-3829-A; however, only film and digital video recordings are anomalous. Transcripts, audio recordings, still images and illustrations of SCP-3829 are non-anomalous. All instances of SCP-3829-A are identical in content, and change to reflect changes made to other SCP-3829-A instances. After a period of time where no new media is introduced (between 2-7 weeks), SCP-3829 instances will revert to their baseline state.

Regardless of the type of media integrated into SCP-3829, SCP-3829 will always portray itself as a situational comedy, and will never exceed 24 minutes in length. SCP-3829-A instances are capable of integrating any type of media, but appear to function best with media that was produced and/or set during or before October 1997.

Instances of SCP-3829 will also have a consistent anomaly in their content; all interior light fixtures will be bare and unshaded, resulting in visible discomfort in characters as they try to shield their eyes from the lights. Exterior light fixtures, such as streetlights, are not affected by this.

SCP-3829 was discovered after several identical SCP-3829-A instances stored on twenty identical flash drives, with each file entitled "crossingover.mp4" were discovered after having integrated over a dozen episodes of the series Saved by the Bell stored digitally at the Viacom media offices, New York, New York. The flash drives were reportedly bought second-hand by an intern from an electronics store in Queens; tracing of records from this store has found evidence that the company which originally produced SCP-3829 was known as "Omar Studios". No record of this company exists.

Addendum: SCP-3829 Baseline:

In its default state, SCP-3829 begins with a short series of title cards introducing three main characters: "Man 1", "Man 2", and "Woman". appearing as two adult Caucasian males and an adult Caucasian female, respectively. The names of the actors portraying these characters change from to viewing to viewing, but are chosen from a pool of names of actors and actresses active from 1980-1997. The final title card reads "Crossing Over".

The episode begins with Man 1 sitting in a white, sterile room devoid of any furniture except for a sofa, a bare light fixture hanging overhead, a window, and a door. Man 1 is reading a newspaper1 when Man 2 walks in through the door. Man 2 then says, "Hello Man 1. I am sexually attracted to Woman, with whom you are also sexually interested in," to which Man 1 replies, "I strongly disapprove of this." Dialog is delivered with little intonation, but active body language.

The scene cuts to Man 1, Man 2, and Woman standing in the same white room. Man 2 exclaims, "I love you," and Man 1 responds with, "So do I." Both characters then slip on banana peels lying on the ground and fall, followed by studio audience laughter. Woman then says, "Due to the act of clumsiness I have just witnessed, I am no longer sexually interested in either of you," followed by more studio laughter. The scene then cuts to only Man 1 and Man 2 standing in the room; in some cases, either Man 1 or Man 2 will be holding a can simply labeled "BEER" in large, block lettering. Man 2 says to Man 1, "I apologize and I have come to the conclusion that our friendship is more important than the pursuit of a sexual relationship," to which Man 2 replies, "I agree with this statement." The men proceed to shake hands while the studio audience cheers. End credits appear; total runtime of SCP-3829 is thirty seconds.

Item #: SCP-001

Object Class: Proteus

Special Containment Procedures:

Description: SCP-001 refers to a series of objects that are considered puzzles, games, or

Electronic copy below as per Federal Records Act

UIU File 1958-092: Codename: Edison

Summary: Subject is deceased, no body remaining. Five FBI operatives killed in confrontation with subject's allies at Thorston, Kentucky. All members of opposing force deceased, all technology confiscated and placed into storage.

Link to the Silber Age of SCPs.

(I couldn't resist the pun.)

http://pastebin.com/YDtXZWi5

Other ideas I Couldn't get into the bin because I pressed "create page" on accident:

A team of future heroes called the Omega Squadron, led by Dr. Daath

Silber Serpent's Hand
Wogglebug The same.
Wogglebug Just leave them as they are. Maybe a bit more bookish.

Prometheus Labs is a team of displaced Axis, Soviet, and Eastern European scientists whom no country wanted to employF

"Don't talk about the dinosaurs - it'd be a shame if you got mauled by a lion when you get back to Texas"

BEHOLD THE END OF ALL THAT EVER WAS, IS, AND EVER WILL BE. I mean, uh, hi. Sorry, Lovecraftian Slip.

An article that explores anarchy and non-human sapience, conveying paranoia.

Tales

Ihpkmn's Talebox
Ihpkmn's Talebox 2: Because The First One Kept Getting Full
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