pixeltalker's current draft (short)

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Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: No special containment procedures are required. Usage of SCP-XXXX in forensic procedures must be pre-approved by Level-2 personnel. All usage must be logged, and include date, purpose, subject and the reported result.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an analytical device of unknown manufacture visually similar to an infrared thermometer. The primary visible parts of the device are a small screen (capable of displaying up to 3 digits) and an unlabelled button.

When the device is pointed at an object and the button is pressed, the device emits a beeping sound and displays a number. Based on the current test data, this number represents a percentage of human tissue (or its derivatives) present in the object.

The method of identification used by SCP-XXXX is unknown. Its internal structure is unknown. A non-destructive way to disassemble SCP-XXXX was not found. In scans, the structure is obscured by a strong interference from a single internal location, assumed to be the power source.

While the exact percentage displayed by SCP-XXXX is hard to confirm, its ability to identify the presence of human tissue matches other methods and known history of tested objects. In fact, capabilities of SCP-XXXX far exceed alternative testing methods. As an example, SCP-XXXX is able to correctly distinguish human and animal ashes even when DNA is completely eliminated by the cremation process.

SCP-XXXX was discovered in a warehouse in Oslo, Norway during an unrelated investigation. The device was found on top of a storage crate, YYYYY an unmarked blue folder. The folder contained a single page in an unknown language, with two note clipped to it. YYYYY Foundation linguists were able to identify the language of notes as similar to Finnish.

Remember, even 1% must be reported.
Trust the scanner!

Karr

Saw that 50-fish you found, I wish I didn't.
If you need a few days stress leave, let me know.
Karr

Testing Overview:
Percentages skipped for brevity.

• Tissue, human — correctly identified as human
• Tissue, animal — correctly identified as non-human
• Ashes, human — correctly identified as human
• Ashes, animal — correctly identified as non-human
• Bones, human, ground — correctly identified as human
• Salt, from human tears — correctly identified as human
• Acid, with dissolved human tissue — correctly identified as human
• Packaged meat, retail — correctly identified as non-human. Exception: one package reported as 2% human (confirmed by alternative testing).

+ Incident Report I-XXXX-1. Level 4 clearance required.

Document# I-XXXX-1
Date: 9/7/20██

During Test 32 (packaged meat), Researcher Zhao accidentally activated SCP-XXXX while it was aimed at Agent Gensler. In previous human trials, all results in the range of 85% to 99% depending on the thickness of clothes, metal grafts, and stomach contents.

However, a result of 0% was displayed after the beep. Researcher Zhao repeated the scan, assuming malfunction, but got 0% once again. Seeing her reaction, Agent Gensler quickly approached her and looked at the screen. When he saw the result, Gensler became agitated, saying that it was bullshit and he was certainly a human. He forcefully removed SCP-XXXX from Researcher Zhao and aimed it her instead, to prove that the device was broken. After a beep, 97% was displayed.

Agent Gensler's erratic behavior caused monitoring system to alert site security. When security team entered the room, Gensler had pointed SCP-XXXX at them, claiming that he would prove it's faulty once and for all. His gesture combined with an unrecognized weapon-like SCP caused security team to assume an armed hostile, terminating Agent Gensler.

Post-Incident Details

All known methods of forensic analysis failed to identify Agent Gensler's body as anything other than human. His history did not include any SCPs capable of cloning or otherwise imitating humans. No ties with any hostile organizations were discovered. Psychological evaluation of the incident records has characterized his behavior as consistent with non-anomalous stress response.

All examples of Agent Gensler's tissues were consistently reported as 0% by SCP-XXXX.

Wider testing of human personnel with SCP-XXXX is currently [REDACTED].

YYYYYY:

+ Document XXXX-D-1

YYY. Each day I read about burning cities, mass graves, YYYYY.

It started with this device, AO-X-17. We found it YYYY. I've read their notes so many times I can recite them word by word. And so YYYY.

YY_We don't understand how it does it_YY. But you don't need to understand before you put things into a replicator pipeline. The only thing we could not replicate was the power source — but we found a simple replacement. YYYY

It did not take long to find the first zero.

YY The thing is, we still don't know. YY

Draft 1

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: No special containment procedures are required. Usage of SCP-XXXX in forensic procedures must be pre-approved by Level-2 personnel. All usage must be logged, and include date, purpose, subject and the reported result.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an analytical device of unknown manufacture visually similar to an infrared thermometer. The primary parts of the device are:

1. Small screen capable of displaying 3 characters: 2 digits and a percent sign
2. Detector surface
3. An unlabeled button

When detector surface is pointed to an object and the button is pressed, the device emits a single beep, and a percentage value is displayed on the screen. This value has been identified as a relative amount of human tissue (or its derivatives) present in the object.

The method of identification used by SCP-XXXX is unknown. Its internal structure is unknown. A non-destructive way to disassemble SCP-XXXX was not found. In scans, the structure is obscured by a strong glow from a single internal location, assumed to be its power source.

While the exact percentage displayed by SCP-XXXX is hard to confirm, its ability to identify the presence of human tissue matches other methods and known history of tested objects. However, capabilities of SCP-XXXX far exceed alternative testing methods. As an example, SCP-XXXX is able to correctly distinguish human and animal ash even when DNA is completely eliminated by the cremation process.

SCP-XXXX was discovered in a warehouse in Oslo, Norway during an unrelated investigation. The device was found on top of a storage crate, with a nearby note written in an unidentified Finnish dialect:

Remember, even 1% is illegal and must be reported.
If you are unsure, report!

Karr

Testing Overview:
Percentages skipped for brevity.

• Tissue, human — correctly identified as human
• Tissue, animal — correctly identified as non-human
• Ash, human — correctly identified as human
• Ash, animal — correctly identified as non-human
• Bones, human, ground — correctly identified as human
• Salt, from human tears — correctly identified as human
• Acid, with dissolved human tissue — correctly identified as human
• Packaged meat, retail — correctly identified as non-human. Exception: one package reported as 2% human (confirmed by alternative testing).

+ Incident Report I-XXXX-1. Level 4 clearance required.

Document# I-XXXX-1
Date: 9/7/20██

During Test 32 (packaged meat), Researcher Zhao accidentally activated SCP-XXXX while it was aimed at Agent Gensler. In previous human trials, all results in the range of 85% to 99% depending on the thickness of clothes, metal grafts, and stomach contents.

However, a result of 0% was displayed after the beep. Researcher Zhao repeated the scan, assuming malfunction, but got 0% once again. Seeing her reaction, Agent Gensler quickly approached her and looked at the screen. When he saw the result, Gensler became agitated, saying that it was bullshit and he was certainly a human. He forcefully removed SCP-XXXX from Researcher Zhao and aimed it her instead, to prove that the device was broken. After a beep, 97% was displayed.

Agent Gensler's erratic behavior caused monitoring system to alert site security. When security team entered the room, Gensler had pointed SCP-XXXX at them, claiming that he would prove it's faulty once and for all. His gesture combined with an unrecognized weapon-like SCP caused security team to assume an armed hostile, terminating Agent Gensler.

Post-Incident Details

All known methods of forensic analysis failed to identify Agent Gensler's body as anything other than human. His history did not include any SCPs capable of cloning or otherwise imitating humans. No ties with any hostile organizations were discovered. Psychological evaluation of the incident records has characterized his behavior as consistent with non-anomalous stress response.

All examples of Agent Gensler's tissues were consistently reported as 0% by SCP-XXXX.

Wider testing of human personnel with SCP-XXXX is currently [REDACTED].