SCP-???? - Mutually Exclusive
rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-????

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Artificial Intelligence Construct "Brooks" oversees all containment of SCP-????. This includes the identification of unusual events that occur as a consequence of SCP-????, allotment of resources to suppress these events, and guiding personnel to perform appropriate containment and cover-up operations.

Description: SCP-???? is a phenomenon wherein humans are incapable of contemplating cell phones and [REDACTED] at the same time, where [REDACTED] is an area found in many homes. For example, 100% of subjects asked to list places where a cell phone can be used failed to mention [REDACTED]; likewise, subjects in or near [REDACTED] will fail to register any sensory input related to cell phones. Conscious contemplation of one appears to prevent cognition or awareness of the other.

Subjects will almost never identify any discrepancy in their perception or understanding of reality as a consequence of SCP-????, either during or after exposure to its effects. As such, despite the ubiquity of SCP-????, containment operations are only necessary in cases where SCP-???? results in particularly unusual events. Awareness of SCP-????'s existence provides no insulation from its effect; as such, containment must be conducted in a manner so that the humans involved either require an awareness of cell phones or of [REDACTED], but not both.

The majority of containment-worthy SCP-???? incidents involve the failure to use a cell phone to address a situation involving [REDACTED], which becomes particularly conspicuous in the case of an injury or other emergency. About 100 yearly deaths are attributable to SCP-????, most of whom are elderly or otherwise infirm individuals who fall in or near [REDACTED] and are unable to get medical attention. Individuals using a cell phone are also liable to trip over objects in or near [REDACTED], which occasionally results in injury. In either case, the incident can be handled via amnestic administration.

Commercial enterprises whose products are associated with [REDACTED] often have difficulty conducting business via cell phone; in these cases, suppression of cell phone signals in and near these buildings is generally sufficient to either prevent unusual incidents or provide a plausible explanation for the ones that still occur.

SCP-???? was originally detected by Artificial Intelligence Construct "Brooks" in 2004. Brooks.AIC is a self-aware computer program developed by the Foundation for the purpose of identifying and overseeing containment of anomalies that cannot be safely or properly comprehended by humans. Brooks.AIC has also been tasked with overseeing testing of SCP-???? and the creation of this documentation.

SCP-???? is presumed to have existed as early as the invention of the cell phone, though this is difficult to confirm, as documentation is sparse. Similarly, it is unclear what, if anything, the consequences of leaving SCP-???? uncontained were.

previous iterations of this page should have the miscellaneous bullshit i stored here over the years