Scott Sexton
rating: 0+x

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid Keter1

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be contained within a standard 3 x 3 x 2 meter humanoid containment cell at Site-06-3. SCP-XXXX's cell is to be soundproofed, and no sound recording or monitoring devices are to be placed within it's cell. Any and all previous recordings of SCP-XXXX's performances which mention anomalous entities are to be disposed of. Site operatives are required to wear standard earplugs when interacting with SCP-XXXX, unless for interviews or experimental purposes.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a Caucasian human male, aged 28, 146 centimeters tall and weighs 67.9 kg (at the time of this writing.) In interviews, SCP-XXXX has given it's name as Michael S█████, a comedian active in the United States. Cross-referencing this information with public record, social media, purported relatives, as well as a DNA test and [REDACTED] have confirmed it's claim to be accurate.

SCP-XXXX exhibits it's anomalous effects when it tells a joke2 regarding any specific item or entity. After telling a joke, the subject of that joke enters an "active state" if such a state is applicable to the subject. Testing conducted to determine "telling a joke" have revealed the following prerequisites;

  • There must be at least one listener present.
  • Listener must be able to understand SCP-XXXX's speech.
  • The words being spoken must follow a standard setup/punchline format.
  • The subject of the joke must be a specific item for the effects to occur.

Whether or not the listener(s) find the jokes funny does not yet seem to have any effect on the anomalous effect of SCP-XXXX. If the joke is made about a large quantity of items, or is focused more on the "concept" of an item, rather than one in particular, the joke has no effect. If the entity being joked about does not have an "active state", then the joke has no effect.

SCP-XXXX was captured after a performance at a comedy club in Towson, Maryland. During the performance, SCP-XXXX made a joke regarding SCP-███ which resulted in the disappearance of ██ spectators.

Put this in an addendum: SCP-XXXX has a very limited knowledge of any SCP objects, what information he does have he has implied was learned through agents of the Chaos Insurgency and individuals associated with Dr.Wondertainment.

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