Ash Williams' sandbox

I have exactly two jobs. My first job is to mind the gate and make sure no-one gets in – or out – without the proper authorisation. My second is to “not notice” certain things that goes on in the base.
Makes ya paranoid as hell, but when the pay’s this high for a job this menial, I can manage keeping my ears closed and my hand open.
Let me give you an example:

10:15, Saturday 23rd: A large armed convoy comes in with this huge container. Think I hear something banging on the inside. Banging, they ask? What banging? I shrug the question off and wave them along. Just another day in the life.

And there was other stuff too – submarine people, that weird pink goo, that little bastard dog, the weirdo with two heads and that panicked guy they apparently pinched in his sleep (he still had his dressing gown on) – and I didn’t ask, because I didn’t want to know. I suppose the pay grade would be better higher up but I figure the risks are higher inside than they are outside. No, I’m happy where I am: safe from the inside, safe from the outside, and earning enough to retire a few years early. I’m thinking Baltimore. It’s more temperate than Site 151, at any rate. It’s bloody cold out here in the woods. You’d expect it to be warmer this close to the water. No, it’s fucking Alaska or Canada or some shit.
Boy, I feel sorry for the last guy who had the job. Some Major forgot the code whilst on assignment – apparently an important one – and he wouldn’t let him past the gate. Really stupid thing to do, but you’ve gotta give him credit for sticking to the book – can’t tell whether he was brave or stupid, but I’d vouch for stupid. Think he was sent for a disciplinary. I hope he wasn’t sent for “correction” – I’ve heard some nasty things about that.
Whatever goes on in that base is none of my business. I’m just the guy at the gate. Anything after my small stretch of road does not concern me.
One thing that did concern me, however, was the attack.


Laing: So it was roughly two weeks ago, in the early hours of – what was the date?
Interviewer: It was the twelfth of [REDACTED].
Laing: Ah yes, that was it. Around 7-ish, maybe 7:30. It was definitely before the dawn.
Interviewer: And what is the first thing you remember relating to the incident?
Laing: I don’t know where they came from, they just seemed to appear from nowhere. Hundreds of them, maybe thousands.
Interviewer: How did they get past the security perimeter?
Laing: That I can’t explain. I really don’t know, they must’ve teleported or gone invisible or something.
Interviewer: There were no infra-red readings indicating any mass presences that would normally have been recorded for such a large body of people.
Laing: Well they sure as hell didn’t dig their way in, and I’m fairly certain I would’ve noticed 500-odd people falling from the sky.
Interviewer: Could you make out their facial features?
Laing: Of course not. It was too dark and I think they had [DATA EXPUNGED]. Anyway, the lads up at the front saw them and let off a couple of rounds, tried to give them a scare. Didn’t seem to work. So they tried firing directly on them. In hindsight, that was probably a huge mistake.
Interviewer: Why, what happened after they opened fire?
Laing: I don’t know, I didn’t see! There were some flashes of light, some weird noises, and then I heard them screaming.
Interviewer: Noises? What kind of noises?
Laing: I’m not sure how to describe it… It was like a radio tuned in on static turned up to full, interference, static, stuff like that. They sent a tank out with some reinforcements. I didn’t see the rest, it was behind the trees. Couldn’t miss it when the place went up, though.
Interviewer: Have you any idea who these people are and why they did this?
Laing: If I knew I would tell you.
Interviewer: Okay, one last question: why did they ignore you?
Laing: *shrugs* I’m just the guy at the gate.


Really not good for them, this happening so close to the independent review. They're really not happy about this. Really not happy.